Getting the Most Out of Therapy
Five Practical Tips to Maximize Treatment
These days it seems like just about everyone is in therapy. Compared to previous decades, more people seeking are psychological help and being open about doing so. But more than just being a popular form of self-care, psychotherapy has the potential to be a life-altering experience that has a domino effect on many domains of your life.
That being said, it’s not uncommon to feel uncertain about whether you’re in the ‘right’ type of therapy, wonder whether your therapist is a good fit for you, and doubt whether you’re actually benefitting from treatment as much as you could. Struggling with these questions can lead to putting therapy off, avoiding it all together, or dropping out prematurely.
Whether you’re a prospective client wondering how you can get the most out of your therapy experience, or a current client who’s feeling uncertain about how much you’re benefitting from treatment, here’s a few suggestions for how to get the most out of your therapy experience. I’ve separated my tips according to where you’re at in the therapy process.
Before treatment
1. Spend some time thinking about what you want out of therapy.
This might seem fairly obvious but you might be surprised at the number of clients who respond with “I don’t know” when I ask them what they want from therapy. Start by identifying a general area you’d like to see improve (e.g., feel less anxious, be more confident) and then try to get more specific. You can help yourself get specific by asking, “if I was feeling better, what would I be doing more of or less of?” This can help translate vague goals into more specific ones, e.g., getting to the gym twice a week, going on two new dates a month, leaving my current job.
2. Pick a therapy type that fits with your needs and preferences.
There are oodles of therapy modalities out there that vary in theoretical orientation, amount of structure, role of the therapist and client, length, etc. Don’t be surprised if you start to feel a little overwhelmed by all the options out there. Start with reading some good summaries about different therapy modalities here and here. Outside of this research, reflect on your preferences for certain aspects of therapy such as amount of structure you’d like in a session, the length of treatment you can commit to, how much time in between sessions you’re willing to spend on your therapy ‘homework,’ how direct/indirect you’d like your therapist to be, and if gender, ethnicity, or sexual orientation of the therapist are a factor. If it’s feasible, it’s not a bad idea to have an initial consultation with several therapists to help you decide who might be a good fit for you.
During Treatment
3. Talk about expectations with your therapist.
Problems can quickly arise in therapy when the client and therapist don’t share the same expectations of one another or for treatment itself. For example, if you start working with a CBT therapist thinking you’ll be focusing exclusively on your childhood, you’ll soon feel disappointed when they prompt you to think about your issues in the present moment. Likewise, if you’re hoping to see most of your problems disappear in four sessions, you’re bound to feel dissatisfied no matter what type of therapy you’re in. In order to have realistic expectations, it can be helpful to ask these questions to your therapist early on in therapy:
(i) What is my treatment plan?
(ii) What do you expect of me as an active participant in therapy?
(iii) How long does it typically take to benefit from therapy?
(iv) What can I realistically expect from you as my therapist?
4. Have the difficult conversations
Therapy is one of the rare instances where you can have difficult or embarrassing conversations without fear of judgement or defensiveness from someone else. Take advantage of this feature, especially when you’re struggling to see the benefit of treatment. Push yourself to have the difficult conversations and ask questions such as “I’m feeling confused about the focus of treatment. Can you tell me about your plan?” or “I’m not feeling like therapy has been helpful so far. Can we explore why?” These conversations are important and can impact your experience in treatment for the better. I can guarantee that your therapist wants to know how you’re feeling about treatment and wants a chance to help repair the issue and make the situation better.
5. Do the homework
Many forms of therapy will suggest homework to do in between sessions. Therapy homework can include things like reading the chapter of a book pertaining to your issues; writing down your thoughts, emotions, and behaviours; confronting a feared situation; or practicing engaging in a healthy coping behaviour, for example. Clients don’t always realize that doing therapy homework is a strong predictor of how much they’ll benefit from treatment (LeBeau et al., 2013). If you’re skipping the homework in between sessions, this may be one of the reasons you’re not benefiting from treatment. You wouldn’t expect to transform your physical fitness if you saw your personal trainer once a week but skipped the workouts in between (as nice as that would be). If you’re having issues completing therapy homework, talk to your therapist. Sometimes these issues can reflect broader patterns (e.g., perfectionism, fear of failure, emotional avoidance) that are fruitful to talk about and trouble-shoot. Remember, this isn’t like being in school where you’ll get in trouble for not doing your homework.
If all this talk of therapy has left you inspired to pursue your own treatment, consider consulting the Ontario Psychological Association’s Find A Psychologist service or Psychology Today to find a suitable practitioner near you.
LeBeau, R.T., Davies, C.D., Culver, N.C., & Craske, M. (2013). Homework compliance counts in cognitive behavioral therapy. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, 42, 171-179. Doi: 10.1080/16506073.2013.763286?
This post is for informational purposes only and should not be considered therapeutic advice or a replacement for individual therapy. For more information on locating a psychologist near you, please contact your family doctor, the Ontario Psychological Association, the Canadian Association for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, or Psychology Today
